Demur is a verb meaning to object or hesitate before agreeing to something; demure is an adjective describing someone quiet, modest and reserved. He demurred at signing the contract; she gave a demure smile. The spelling difference is just one letter, but the words do completely different jobs in a sentence.
The core difference
Demur is a verb meaning to object or hold back; demure is an adjective meaning modestly reserved.
- demur — to object or be reluctant, to balk at something: He demurred at signing the contract without reading it first.
- demure — quiet, modest and reserved in manner: She gave a demure smile and looked away.
How to tell them apart
The easiest way to keep these straight is to check what job the word is doing in the sentence. Demur is a verb, something a person does when they hesitate or raise an objection. Demure is an adjective, a description of someone's quiet, modest manner.
The mix-up usually happens because the words sound almost identical when spoken. If you can swap in "object" and the sentence still makes sense, you want demur; if you can swap in "modest", you want demure.
