General
cns-qns
What does cns-qns mean?
Fake abbreviation aping a real lab report: 'Central Nervous System: Quantity Not Sufficient.' QNS is genuine pathology shorthand for a sample too small to test. Bolted onto CNS, it becomes a sly insult about the patient's intelligence, written nowhere but spoken everywhere.
"Tried to explain why he can't eat before the scope four times, total CNS-QNS."
Origin
Riff on the genuine lab abbreviation QNS ('quantity not sufficient').
Frequently asked questions
What does CNS-QNS mean?
It's a mock lab result — a joke among medical staff — meaning the patient isn't very bright.
How do you use CNS-QNS in a sentence?
"Off the record, the chart may as well have said CNS-QNS."
Is CNS-QNS a real medical term?
No, it's unofficial dark humour, playing on "QNS" (quantity not sufficient) applied to the central nervous system.
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